I Cried in My Ice Cream

I try to be the type of person who sees the glass as half full, but sometimes I want to pick that glass up and throw it across the room.  For ten days straight (yes, I counted them), blow after blow hit me like a ton of bricks.  It seemed like I had a target on my back and every hell hound had been sent to attack my goals, plans, and thoughts.  From having to postpone the release of retreat packages because technology hated me to being late for work because someone decided to park behind my car in the parking lot of my complex, life came at me fast and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.  My stress level was ridiculously high.  Do not get me started about how disappointed I was when I missed deadlines.  Uggg!!!

By the time the weekend arrived, I was spent.  There was no fight left in me so I waved my white flag as a sign of surrender.  Surrendering was tough.  Really tough.  For me, surrendering meant I had given up.  The agony of defeat was a weight that was too heavy for me to carry.  The things that happened were beyond my control, but for some reason, I thought I could control it.  I felt like I was making excuses for why I failed.  Superwoman had to hang up her cape.  So, I took my deflated spirit to the nearest grocery store and bought a half pint of ice cream, sprinkles, chocolate sauce, and caramel sauce.  This was not a game.  It was a level 10, code blue situation that only cookies-n-cream could resolve.

I got home and grabbed my favorite bowl to commence with eating my troubles away.  As I scooped ice cream, my eyes began to fill with tears.  Next thing I know, I’m in full blown ugly cry.  You know, the kind of cry where you hyperventilate a little, your face contorts, and your upper lip quivers.  The ten days worth of events played back in my mind like a bad movie.  I tried to figure out where I went wrong.  By this time, I was sitting on my kitchen flow crying mega tears in my bowl of ice cream and it was at that moment I realized, life happens. Boom! Revelation!

One of the great things about going through things is that you can learn many things about yourself IF you choose.  I had a few choices to make:  I could give up and shut down my business throwing away the hard work I’ve done for quite some time now OR I could evaluate each instance and create a plan of action.  Now, being the goalslayer that I am, of course I chose to evaluate and create.

Whether we like it or not, bad things happen at the most inopportune times.  We can have great momentum slaying every goal in sight when out of now where comes technology problems, double-parked cars, or whatever to stop you dead in your tracks.  Think about it this way, if you were not up to something worth challenging, you would not be challenged.

There are over 300 days left in 2017 and I cannot dwell on the ten days that were not so pleasant. There are better days ahead and that gives me hope.  Hope to believe that all things are working together for my good.  Hope that things will get better.  Hope that my hard work will pay off and my return of investment will cause me to appreciate the tough times.

Every day will not be full of wins.  When we take an “L”  go back and view the film.  Take one instance at a time, create an action plan, and adjust accordingly.  I picked myself off of my kitchen floor with my perfectly crafted bowl of ice cream, wiped my tears and grabbed my notebook.  By the time I had taken the last bite, I felt relieved not because of the ice cream, but because I had a sense of peace.  Even when things don’t go as I had intended, there is a greater plan at work.  Nobody told me that journey would be easy but my heart is telling me that the journey will be worth it.  Step by step…little by little.


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